Humor is an important part of life. Fortunately, I married a lady who has a good sense of humor, both to make me laugh and to put up with me. I remember throwing a little water on Shirley when we were dating, thinking she would do the same back to me. She surprised me by coming around the corner of the kitchen with a Big Gulp cup full of water and doused me! I thought “this girl knows how to have fun!”

One of Shirley’s ideas when the kids were young was to start a book of their funny sayings. It was always handy in our kitchen drawer so we could capture those funny sayings. So, for a bit of comic relief, here’s some of our favorite funny sayings from the kids, starting with their younger years and moving to older.

• When Shirley asked the girls what they would like to name the new baby (Andrew), Kayli said “God or Jesus.” Summer said “Mary Poppins”
• Summer was at Nana and Papa’s house watching football for awhile. Later she was asked what she wanted to do and she said, “I want to watch the guys fall down.”
• Kayli would ask to wear her zucchini (meaning her bikini)
• Kayli: “Mom, can we have peanuts for a snack?” Summer: “That’s what boys have, peanuts.”
• After putting Summer down to sleep, she came out of the room with a little pumpkin saying, “This pumpkin is keeping me awake. He just wants to be with his family.”
• Kayli: “Did you know this Summer? This is incredible! I was born right on my birthday!”
• Shirley was telling the girls how beautiful she thought it was outside. “The palm trees are so pretty, the trees are green . . .” Summer said right after “Look how beautiful the streets are. They are so black.”
• Kayli was opening her Easter eggs and she came upon an empty one. Shirley said “I’m sorry we forgot to put candy in this one. Kayli said, “That’s OK, I got an empty tomb egg. Jesus is gone.”
• Kayli while driving in Michigan: “Mom, Dad, those cows are being really naughty! They are waving their bottoms at us!”
• Summer was helping Shirley do a few things with her prosthetic leg and she said “Mom, your leg is under nourished.”
• Summer: “Mom, can we work for credit cards?”
• Shirley expressed frustration at the messes the kids were making. Summer said, “Well then you shouldn’t of had any kids!”
• Kayli: “I know how you can tell a boy dog from a girl dog. A boy dog has whiskers.”
• Andrew said he wanted to play baseball. Joel said “When you are bigger.” A few minutes later Andrew said, “I’m bigger now Dad.”
• Kayli: “Mom, do you wear mascara?” Shirley: “YES” Kayli: “Ooooh! That’s made of bat poop!”
• Kayli: “Here is the church, here is the steeple. Open the door and see all the pastors.”
• Andrew, with importance: “I’m, the Queen of Kings!”
• Summer: “Can insects marry their relatives?”
• Andrew: “How do you spell “I don’t want to have friends?””
• Summer’s cousin Caleb wanted to give a hug and say good-bye. Summer said “I think a handshake will do.”
• Andrew when he heard there would be a make-up game when one was cancelled: “I don’t want to wear make-up!!”
• Summer: “You have dragon breath. If you breathe in, you could kill yourself.”
• Kayli: “Mom, do you get your shoes for half price?”
• Andrew came out of the bathroom at a bowling party. Shirley: “Did you wash your hands?” Andrew: “ Yes . . . but I forgot to wipe!” (and he ran back into the bathroom)
• Kayli: “Dad, I’ve been thinking about it . . . and I have decided you are not an orc.”
• Andrew: “I’m not going to get married . . . unless someone likes me.”
• Summer: “I don’t think Andrew is trying to show off. If he is, then he’s not succeeding.”
• Kayli: “If it were possible to love a cat so much you would marry it, that would be me with Zipper . . . even if she does smell.”
• Summer looking at some of Shirley’s clothes: “I guess that’s what I will wear when I get old.”
• Kayli while tying cherry stems into knots with her tongue: “I have a more ambidextrous tongue.”
• Andrew: “You know why people say I’m ugly? Because my middle name is Joel.”
• Kayli: “Nobody is perfect. I’m a nobody. So therefore I am perfect.”
• When asking Andrew if he knew what hot dogs are made of he replied: “Aren’t they made from pig’s wieners”
• Summer: “You can prank call people and ask what their favorite utensil is. Mine is a spatula.”
• Summer: “I have the heart of champion and the legs of a spectator.”

Hope you enjoyed the humor!!